Who I Stand With and Why

We’ve all been watching the news from the USA, many of us with mounting horror and dread. It’s just one horrible thing after another. The worst kind of people gaining power and control. The wholesale wrecking of government departments and sacking of even essential staff. The demolishing of legal rights and protections for and attacks on the most vulnerable, the erosion of human rights, the muzzling of the press… And on and on it goes. It’s scary stuff, especially for those into history. There’s an onslaught of enmity directed at anyone who doesn’t fit into the cis, straight, white, male, middle- or upper-class, born-in-the-USA conservative Christian mould - even conservative Christian women now, which is surprising no-one but those women themselves.

The most important question is not ‘what will THEY do next’, because we can all guess, even if only by looking at history. (Concentration camps, anyone?) The Big Question is, how much and for long will the American people put up with it, before they rise up in rebellion? When (not if, but when) that will happen, what form it will take, how successful it will be, what the end result will be, is anyone’s guess. The only sure thing is that it can’t go on like this.

The new ‘rulers’ are of course presuming on shock and awe to keep everyone under their thumb. But I think they underestimate people. Even Americans, who, let’s face it, have had their education system run down, their rights steadily eroded, their economy tanked - FOR DECADES - and who have been indoctrinated into believing that ‘Murrka is the Greatest Country on Earth’, are not going to take it forever. Or even for that much longer. And of course the targeted groups are probably going to play a pivotal role in leading the resistance, because they have to. Because it’s THEIR lives at stake.

To be sure, many of those in the most vulnerable categories are feeling terrified and helpless. Some are leaving or planning to leave the worst states or even the country. (And let’s be clear, you’re not a coward if you can and do flee. Some are more vulnerable than others, or lack the capacity to fight.) Others are trying to help them get to ‘sanctuary’ states, though how long they will be able to keep gays, trans people, immigrants, women who want abortions etc, safe, is yet another good question. People are right to be scared. But sooner or later, if you’re pushed to the wall, you have to push back, if only because you’re not able to either flee or hide. I think it’s already begun to happen. And let me note here that street demonstrations and court decisions are only the beginning, not the end, of the resistance. I mean, I’d be relieved if they were effective, but I’m not holding my breath. Because Trumpet and his cronies have nothing but contempt for courts, laws, government departments and even their own voters.

I want to make it plain that at least part of my support for these groups is because I identify with those in danger. I’m acutely aware that if I was a US citizen or resident right now, I’d be in danger too. I’m gay, non-binary, autistic and almost certainly ADHD as well, I have multiple physical disabilities and health conditions, including CFS, arthritis, thyroid issues, high cholesterol and diabetes. I am on (government paid-for) medication for the last three of those. I’ve also been poor all my adult life, am dependent on NZ superannuation (i.e. the old age pension), and live in social housing. I’d be a target, for sure, so I really, REALLY feel for all my counterparts in the States.

But it’s more than that. It’s a matter of simple human decency. How anyone thinks it’s okay to attack people who love their own gender, identify as a gender that doesn’t match the body they were born with, are of a different race or religion (or none), fled persecution or poverty in another country to find a better life for themselves and their family, etc, etc, is beyond me. I simply don’t understand this level of cruelty. If I had been alive in 1930s Germany, you can bet I would have been opposing the Nazis, and I’m opposing them now. You’re either on the side of human decency, compassion and justice, or you’re not. End of.

Because of this, I’m not going to waste time pleading for Those In Power to spare my American counterparts. Things have gone way beyond that. I’m not able to do a lot from this distance, but I will certainly do what I can, most especially not allowing myself to be silenced. I don’t know if Big Brother is reading this. Maybe, maybe not. Either way, Big Brother? Go fornicate with Yourself.

Some would say, ‘oh, it’s easy for you to say all this, you don’t live in the States, you’re safe’. But we’re all fooling ourselves if we think the Orange One’s influence stops at the shores of the US. He has already made territorial threats against Canada, Greenland and Panama. He’s blatantly sided with Russia, and publicly attacked Ukraine’s courageous leader to his face. He’s demanded insane things of other countries, or sent his VP to verbally attack them. And that’s all just in less than two months. Not to mention that NONE OF US ARE TOTALLY SAFE if he triggers World War Three. A second American Civil War would affect people way beyond America’s shores. Tariffs or the collapse of American share markets, businesses or banks can also affect the whole world. So no, I don’t think we are going to be totally safe wherever we are.

Not that I’m deluding myself that they’ll come after me personally, I’m not important enough. Nor am I planning (or able, or even wanting) to visit the US any time soon, and New Zealand is not considered an ‘enemy’ of the US, right? ...Right? And Trumpet has really respected America’s traditional allies …right? But he wouldn’t interfere with another country’s citizens… right? Right?

 Truthfully though, I’m more concerned right now about the encouragement he gives to the worst kinds of people everywhere. A member of the coalition government here has proposed a bill to get rid of all DEI laws and regulations. It has little chance of success… so far. Who can say what the future holds.

 But ultimately it doesn’t matter. On the deepest level, I simply do not care. So Big Brother, if you do wanna come after me, all I can say is - bring it. I know who my people are, and who I stand with. And it’s not those currently calling the shots across the other side of the Pacific.

So The Queen Is Dead

So the Queen is dead, and buried, and we have a new monarch.

I’ve been thinking on this for a while, and as usual, my thoughts have been varied.

On the one hand, there’s nothing wrong with people grieving or at least feeling unsettled. For anyone under seventy, including me, she had literally been on the throne our entire lives, and so there was a feeling of shock, of experiencing the end of an era, regardless of individual feelings about royalty. For me, it’s also triggered sad feelings and memories from when my mother died - they were of almost the same generation, and even looked somewhat alike.

It must be acknowledged that the Queen did have many good qualities. She avoided scandal in her private life (unlike a lot of her family), and performed her duties faithfully. She somehow managed to connect with a lot of people despite her privileged position. In person, she was apparently kind, fiercely intelligent, with a steel-trap memory and a great sense of humour. She was, in short, likeable, even admirable, as a person and a monarch.

I also feel that some of the criticism that’s been hurled her way is misplaced. British monarchs have very little real power, being heavily constricted by law, tradition and protocol. They reign but they do not rule. They can’t express any political opinions, and must approve new laws and governments. Even their speeches to the British Parliament are written by the government. It’s anyone’s guess what the Queen’s real political thoughts were, though it’s said that she despised Thatcher for supporting apartheid. Ultimately however she could change little.

As to the royal wealth, ‘The Crown’ and ‘the monarch’ are not quite the same thing. There are things like the Crown Jewels for instance, which the monarch only technically owns, and cannot dispose of at will. The Royal Estates are vast, but they’re actually controlled by a government-appointed committee, with the monarch receiving around 15% of the income, an arrangement which dates back centuries and is part of the complex web of restrictions around the monarch and their family. They’re bound up pretty tight really. I kind of pity them.

And yes, I watched at least some of the processions, funeral, etc, as least as far as possible without depriving myself of too much sleep from the far side of the world. Because, ya know, it’s history, I’m a history geek, and besides nobody does pomp and ceremony quite like the British. As well as being colourful, it was almost funny, all the elaborate parades, drumbeats, fancy uniforms and the like.

Okay, that’s the ‘nicey-nice’ hand. Now for the other stuff.

I don’t share the Queen’s love of tradition or her deep faith, and despite my love of history (or perhaps because of it) and my fascination with the pomp and ceremony, I’m definitely not in favour of monarchies. I consider them rigidly outdated, an encrusted frozen relic of the past which we could easily do without. While I have nothing personal against any of the Royals, I’d be perfectly fine with them becoming just ‘Mr and Ms Windsor who live down the street’. At the moment, there doesn’t seem to be the political or public will to make this happen, at least in Britain itself. The conversation in Britain’s former colonies about becoming republics, however, is well under way.

I think it’s highly likely, indeed inevitable, that by the end of this century if not before, many of these countries, including New Zealand, will become republics. The Queen‘s popularity delayed this process but won’t ultimately prevent it. It will be interesting to see how the new King affects the conversation, given that he excites nowhere near that level of admiration. Even the most ardent royalist must find it hard to enthuse about an irritable old man who once said he wanted to be a tampon. The only thing I find commendable about him is his championing of environmental causes long before it was fashionable. The PR campaign to rehabilitate his reputation has already started of course, but I don’t know how much effect it will ultimately have.

Speaking of PR, I don’t like either how royalty, like movie stars, have pretty much replaced religion as ‘the opiate of the masses’. They’ve become magazine fodder for the credulous, candy-floss for the mind, as a necessary part of keeping their popularity and with it their lifestyle. They may hate the loss of privacy, but I don’t doubt they know why it’s necessary. As long as people are oohing and aahing over pretty pictures of royal children and warring princes, swallowing it all down like candy, few of them are going to wonder if royalty is even needed in the first place.

I also want to say that even though (or perhaps because) I’m a person of European descent in a former British colony, I detest colonisation and the damage it’s done, a process that even if it wasn’t exactly ‘by’ royalty, was often supported by them, and done ‘in their name’. I believe much more dialogue about colonisation and its results is necessary, and that anti-monarchists, especially non-white peoples who have suffered at the hands of colonial powers, are entitled both to express their opinion and demand change and I don’t think they should be silenced or arrested for doing so.

Then there’s all the stuff about her ‘doing her duty’. But I’ve noticed people are always vague about what that duty WAS. When I look at what she actually did, I see a lot of opening of new hospital wings or schools, a lot of walkabouts, a lot of meeting the public and shaking hands. She entertained foreign dignitaries, hosted garden parties and formal dinners, handed out many a knighthood and medal, and supported multiple charities. She read lots of government papers and kept a finger on the ‘issues’ of the world, even if she couldn’t actually *do* anything about it. She made appropriate speeches at the appropriate time. And so on. In short, she was rather good at being a figurehead.

But we can always do without a figurehead.

Where to from here, then? In New Zealand, the conversation about us someday becoming a republic is ongoing. It’s not urgent, but it’s also true that we don’t feel the attachment to Britain we once did. When I was a child, you could still hear people talking about ‘The Old Country’, and ‘Home’, but that generation is long gone. We consider ourselves New Zealanders now, wherever our ancestors came from (and of course many are not of British origin), and are evolving a culture of our own, one which is increasingly influenced by Māori culture. I find this exciting.

So it will be interesting to see what happens in the coming years. But we can start with increasing those discussions about colonisation and how to heal the wounds from it. That is something we can and urgently need to do. There’s a lot of hurt to be dealt with, a lot of reparation to be made. Getting started on this is way more important than royalty itself.

 

Things I Don't Understand - Number Eleven - Change

I don’t understand change.

Don’t get me wrong here. Change as a means of improvement, I’m fine with. Without it, we wouldn’t have things like safer cars, improved rights for minorities, better health care, and the Internet. And yes, it does bring undesirable things too, but I can understand the roots of those, even if I don’t like them much.

I can also understand change as variety, something to spice up life, because every day being the same can be totally, mind-numbingly, boring. I can cope with this kind of change, as long as it doesn’t happen too much, too often, and I can go back to my ‘normal’ afterwards.

But change simply for change’s sake, that’s the one I don’t understand.

Take for instance when supermarkets switch items round in their aisles, so that what was once in Aisle Seven, is now who knows where, because for sure you don’t. Or when manufacturers change the packaging of their products, so you can’t even recognise them. Or worst of all, they actually stop making your favourite of some product, for no reason at all that you can figure out.

Then there are things like the fashion industry, which constantly changes its ‘look’, so that even if you do find a style that fits and you look not-too-bad in, next year it’ll be gone, and something uncomfortable and unflattering will take its place. Not to mention that they use crappy fabrics, and charge outrageous prices, and that some of their designs would make you a laughing stock if you actually wore them in the street. And don’t get me even started on POCKETS. We’re conned into thinking this absurdity is good, people make movies, TV programs and even write books about it, it’s become normalised, and largely unquestioned.

A lot of it seems to be about money – if this product isn’t making them a squillion of profits, they toss it and make something else. Never mind if lots of people are quite happy with the existing one. Or supermarkets, department stores, etc, will rearrange their floors because they want to put more ‘high-value’ (ie, more profitable) stuff where people will see it and impulse buy. And fashion, of course, is definitely about money, especially at women’s expense, as we’re the ones being the most badly conned (or forced, for lack of alternatives) into buying their products.  The ethos seems to be ‘make people buy more, make more money, make more money, make more money...’ We’re all in thrall to the Great God Profit.

Politicians seem fond of this kind of change too. Maybe they just like to be seen to be ‘doing something’, even if it’s endless tinkering what should be left alone. We in New Zealand have seen a fair bit of this over the past few decades, especially in regards to things like our health and education systems. Politicians wanted to ‘leave their stamp’ on the country, and they have, not always to good effect.

My feeling is always, why can’t people leave well enough alone? If something ain’t broke, don’t fix it, is my philosophy. This constant change-for-change’s-sake seems to be very much a modern thing, a function of late-stage capitalism perhaps. We now have ‘planned obsolescence’ rather than quality, ‘trends’ rather than a search for perfection, ‘the latest gadget’ rather than the best tool for the job. Change has stopped being about improvement or variety, and become an end in itself, an out-of-control spiral, meant only to further enrich those who have way too much already. This is a big part of what makes the world seem to get crazier every year.

Political analysis aside, I’m sure many NTs feel bugged by much of the above too. But the autistic reaction to this sort of change goes beyond irritation. It can mean very real distress. The world to us is a chaotic place, and we rely on a lot of little things to provide anchors or islands of calm in the swirling mess. If the tinned tomatoes aren’t in Aisle Seven, if our favourite shampoo is discontinued, if we can’t find clothes we like, it feels like the bottom has dropped out of our world. Our anchors are gone, and we’re drifting out to sea in a storm. Our little islands have disappeared, and we’re free-falling into the abyss.

When this happens, our thinking can spiral into what I call catastrophising, where one little thing triggers a chain of thoughts that invariably end in a disaster scenario. No tinned tomatoes – we can’t eat tonight, we’ll go hungry, we’ll starve, be found dead on our kitchen floor. No shampoo – we’ll have to use something that induces sensory overload and meltdowns, or we’ll never be able to wash our hair again, will end up dirty and smelly, lose our jobs, become homeless... No new clothes – we’ll end up dressed in rags or butt-naked, unable to set foot outside our front door, our lives falling apart… You get the picture. Sometimes, we’re able to find a solution, or others help us find one, but we go through the emotional wringer on the way to it.

I’m not saying that the world has to be organised around us. I am saying that other people need to understand that if we get upset about some ‘little thing’ having changed, we’re not ‘making a fuss about nothing’. It’s very real, and very horrible. This world is hard enough for autistics. Please, don’t make it worse.

So yeah, I don’t understand change for change’s sake. And I think I’m not alone.